Part 2, Quantum Heartbreak and the World’s Tiniest Cello

…         He presented rather compelling video proof of an AIDS cure; free, self restoring, non combustible energy; surgery without incision; telomere extension; intriguing speculations into the nature of cancer; and ultimately countless potential factors that begged further research into why such technologies aren’t being utilized- though to answer that I suppose all one would have to do is follow the money. It’s long bothered me and seemed bad enough to give power the benefit of the doubt that the entire economic system was broken by ignorance- yet worse to affirm the suspicion that it was built to be-and remain– broken.

He explained that he used vibrational frequencies, based on the works of Roland Rife, to detect and destroy the cells of the microorganisms behind the large majority of disease- as well as high electromagnetic, sound, or light frequencies to support the bodies own regenerative abilities and homeostasis. Considering the amount of research I’d been doing for some time into quantum theory and it’s implications, it sounded more legitimate than just continuing to achieve alpha meditative states to try and heal the otherwise impossible. I’d heard much crazier claims (autonomic regeneration of the unthinkable) and the more I learn, the more I see that the unexplainable is usually the most effective cure- as well as often the most immediately relevant state in life. But I’m still always struggling to explain everything- to reconcile it with rationality.

Anyways, I finally interjected to propose my own seemingly- inconsequential theories on quantum entanglement (something that particularly fascinates me in its daily manifestations)- and felt rather foolish that I had overlooked an answer so obvious in trying to figure out not only how atomic entanglement occurs, but HOW in the world such phenomena can happen in two particles that have never had spacial contact- independent of divine intervention. He reminded me that energy is never created nor destroyed: so of course the particles of my person have been around- though in separate senses- since the beginning of cellular division and time. Imagine how many millions of times entanglement could occur before any of us come along.

A long rant’s summary- I’ve been trying to figure out why it is that we can have such a strange connection or correlating life events with people that we’ve never previously met?

How does intuition work and how can we so naturally know or experience the state of a loved one, or gain insight into the future? Why do we have sympathy pain at an unknown distance?

Fucking fascinating.

Though I’m sure that I just bored the living hell out of someone. You’re welcome.

After my self- imposed rabbit trail, the scan he was running with the electrodes was done, and he read down the list on his computer screen:

“Your liver and kidneys are rather functionally  disturbed and having a hard time.”

Yep. I was in liver failure three years ago, with problems on and off ever since. My kidneys have been pissed for a while, and more recently working very poorly.

“You have hardening/ narrowing of the arterial veins, and your heart is…”he trailed off. “Well, it’s not important- we can fix it.”

The heart/vein thing was no surprise either- given that’s not the first time I’ve been told that.

“It’s fine, you can tell me. I already know I have an open Mitral valve- though I’ve no idea why the fuck I would have hardening veins- it must’ve been all those goddamn vegetables and plyometrics,” I laughed.

“It says here your heart woke you up last night, beating very irregularly. Did you have dizziness, nausea, tight chest, pins and needles?”

“Yes, all of that.”

OK, naming vital organs and just saying they’re fucked up is easy, but WHOA. 

“And I don’t know where-or whom- you got these “bugs” from..” he stopped and gave me a funny look over the top of his laptop. I looked over at the Buddha and tried not to turn red.

“it’s cool, we’ll take care of it.”

“Such brash confidence,” I countered with a sarcastic smile.

I kept biting on the inside of my cheek, trying not to clench my teeth like I do when I’m stressed. Life shouldn’t be so goddamn complicated and difficult just to stay relatively healthy enough to function a little.  I swear, a little petrochemicals and my body thinks it’s the Armageddon. I felt like crying again- I couldn’t stop thinking about the cumulative weight of everything that had brought me here- when I had thought that by now I would be the one behind the desk for once. I know everyone has problems and appearances can be deceiving and all; but as cliche as it sounds: I couldn’t help but feel sad just looking at the handsome, seemingly successful, confident, Hollywood actor (as I had put together that he actually was as well )sitting in front of me. I couldn’t help but clench my jaw- trying not to cry like I always do- at the way he lit up, speaking about everything with such a lively passion and conviction; just the way I did, what seems like an entirely foreign lifetime ago.

I felt the familiar gnawing that I would never fit in anywhere- much less ever in the attention of someone who was of actual interest to me (as increasingly few and far between they become). I was just my melancholy countenance, though he wasn’t entirely clueless as most to that fact- either it was my grey eyes or I didn’t properly clean off my smeared, running eyeliner that gave it away. I overheard the blonde lady at the front desk saying something about my eyes when I briefly stepped into the other room.

To be continued

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