Old Fragments, August 28th 2006

3:17

Look at the time

Does it mean something?

Because it’s still the same time that I always cry but don’t know why

What could make you feel this way inside?

I tried to call in the middle of the night

but you didn’t pick up at all, so I drifted off in silence

A dark place so familiar, like this floor

Maybe something’s wrong with me, or am I just bipolar?

I think if you knew the truth

The darkest part of who I really am

No one would stay

Will I always scare everyone away?

Save for a strange attraction, with a quite peculiar taste

I’ve got a problem, that much is for sure

I lost my smile someplace I can’t remember

Everyone knows it

But who knows how twisted it really is

I can’t take the pressure

Of having to keep it together

I cut my hair off with scissors today

Anything to try and bring any change

When this book is the only person I speak to anymore

Holding my secrets in silence, opening locked doors

why am I so afraid of love?

I feel inadequate as your eyes ever wander on

As you will me- will I be; the only one you’ll want, the only one you’ll hold

Or will I always be alone, if I can’t fit your fantasy’s mold?

Is it even possible?

Would a kiss hold your attention?

or is this love just an invention?

Shame that there are no such fairytales

In the way they fill children’s heads

I know I’ll be alone in the end

or live in a fake fantasy instead

So maybe we can play pretend, maybe just for a moment?

 

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