12.12 free write

This night is so silent that it fills my heart with fear, when in so many ways I don’t know where to go from here

So far away from the only things that ever made any sense in life, and all that remains is a fallen pretense and waiting for their ends to arrive

How do we change so much in so short a space in time, how do you go from love to I don’t want you in my life

I’ve always had a heart that was either closed or too far out of reach, just going through the motions like most, not feeling anything

And when you wake up to that .1 percent, it just opens you up to poison and disappointment, is it better to always lose or to stay where you’re used to

It’s not an easy thing to do, to speak in a language without the signals mixed up, you’ll look everywhere and yet it never seems to come

And the silence so strange after such a long way, it’ll almost make you believe in a lie, that it’s all in vain when everything’s changing and it’s all a waste of your time

But I have few to no regrets in this futile life I’ve led, it is better to try and to fall than to never try loving at all, and someday you will see life is more than a memory

Someday I tell you when the years have all begun to unwind and you couldn’t read the signs, once you’ve run all out of time- only then perhaps you’ll see what it means when love is blind.

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